Toiletpaper Throwdown

I find it kind of sad that forests are cut down to make something as asinine as toilet paper. With America’s unique cry for soft, plush luxury toilet paper brands like Cottonelle Ultra, Quilted Northern Ultra, and Charmin Ultra comes the felling of many trees, because companies say plush TP can only be made from the fiber of standing trees, not recycled paper.

Unless you have hemorroids (I’m serious), you should be able to get by without toilet paper as soft as a month-old puppy’s fur. I’m not saying to go full sandpaper mode, just downgrade your softness by a notch or two.

If you had to choose between two packages of toilet paper identical in size, price, softness, and quality, but one was recycled and one was made from a standing tree, why not choose the recycled one? I would love to hear your opinions.

Recycled TP brands vary widely by quality so in my search to find the best 100% recycled brand, I noted price, softness, and availability.

100% Recycled Toilet Paper Ratings

White Cloud GreenEarth
Exclusively at Walmart
Wow! I almost want to doubt this is 100% recycled because this brand is as soft and plush as the brands I was bashing above. GreenEarth is thick, soft, durable, and cheap! Also available at almost all the Walmarts in the Austin area.

Green Forest
Found at Wheatsville, HEB
This brand is both cheap and soft, but on the downside it is thin, so you may have to use a little more to get the job done.

365 Brand Toilet Paper
Exclusively at Whole Foods
Whole Food’s recycled TP is thick, durable, and cheap, but what it gains in thickness it loses in softness.

Seventh Generation
Found at HEB, Whole Foods
I feel like Seventh Generation is the most widely distributed brand, so kudos to them. However, it is almost always more expensive than other brands while the quality is not that great. A standard in recycled TP.

CVS Brand Toilet Paper
Exclusively at CVS
The only positives to the toilet paper are that it is cheap and widely available. This TP is thin, rough, and low grade. I imagine this is kind of bath tissue you get in prison. I only recommend this brand if you are in a recycled TP emergency. I’m not sure what constitutes a recycled TP emergency, though.

I have yet to see or try Marcal Small Steps. Let me know your experiences with this brand or any others I’ve left out.

Happy wiping! 😛

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